Mary's Birthday and Life

Yesterday was the birthday of Mary, Mother of God. As Fr. Michael, OP said in his homily last night, "There are only three birthdays that the Church celebrates" and those three are: Jesus' Birthday, John the Baptist's Birthday, and Mary's. While the absolute important is our Lord and Savior's birthday, the other two are important as well.

To celebrate this joyous occasion the group I am apart of, Saint Patrick's Twenties Group decided to have a birthday party for Mary. So, after Mass (which is normally Adoration for the group) the group went to Patrick Hall to celebrate, with cake and ice cream. We had games and socializing, which I think next time I need to bring more board games for others to play. I think it truly was success for the group, a nice size came to the little meeting/party and I for once talked and socialize, which I lack the confidence for at times.

But, why celebrate this birthday, many would ask me or any practicing Catholic. There is always a simple answer for me, she is our spiritual Mother. I could not imagine not celebrating my own Mother's birthday. It is not to say how old they are really, for Mothers a birthday should be to honor their life and honor that they were born to birth us. But that would be my answer, others would have more in-depth answer and quite possibly I could have an in-depth answer, but I feel that a simple one does much justice.

As I mention in the post title, I was not only to write about Mary's Birthday, but also on how life is going for me. Life, sometimes I feel drained out of my wits and feel I am losing much of the ground I conquered in becoming a better person, I ask if anyone who reads this blog, please pray for me. I certainly need it, for I love the person I have become through wonders of understanding how much God's Love is for me.

Thank you and God bless,
Nikita

"Hail, Holy Queen" Briefly noted

For the past week, I have been reading "Hail, Holy Queen" by Scott Hahn, I was looking around Barnes&Noble and noticed this and it reminded me of the retreat I was at on July 31st with the Dominican Laity Chapter I am apart of. I am currently on page 127 in the book. To add a bonus, I suggested this to a book club group I am apart of (that consent of friends from Saint Patrick's Twenties Group) and so hopefully on the fourteenth of this month we will be discussing this book.

Why am I writing, well for the sake of writing, but also because I want to write about what I have been reading about Mary, Mother of God. It sounds funny that Mary is one of those issues that many protestants have beef more so than they do other things. I, coming from a background where religion was not really addressed in my household, I did not have a problem with the Virgin Mary being honored or deemed as my Mother.

"Hail, Holy Queen" is based on Scripture as the key defense of honoring Mary, but also adding historical reference by Early Christians and Church Fathers. "In truth, the Church gives her honor and veneration as the greatest of saints, while reserving adoration and worship for God alone" (Page 112) Examples of what many consider "worship of Mary" would be the following: The Rosary, considering her a Queen of Heaven.

The Rosary in retrospect is the easiest to defend, for the Rosary itself is the life of Jesus through His Mother's eyes, since she was with him from his conception. We say the words that the angel said to Mary when greeting her, "Hail, full of Grace" and what her cousin Elizabeth said, "Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb". Mary, guides us through her Son's life and helps us understand what He did for us, not just for her.

It is kind of like what I tell everyone about Mary's Window (The Moon, which I learned from my godmother). The moon does not have its own light source, no the Sun shines its light on the moon, and that is then reflected down towards Earth. Well, the Sun is Jesus, the Son and the moon is Mary. Jesus shines his saving Grace upon Mary who in turn shares and shines onto us.

The Queen of Heaven is something not only Scott Hahn discussed in his book, but Fr. Thomas, OP spoke of at the retreat. You see, in my cultures and most especially the Israelites culture the King ruled with his Mother, known as the Queen Mother. Mary is the Mother of Jesus, so if he is ruling the Kingdom of Heaven his Mother is with Him as Queen Mother. I would like to quote a few paragraphs in "Hail, Holy Queen":

"Consider the following scene from early in Solomon's reign: "So Bathsheba went to King Solomon, to speak to him on behalf of Adonijah. And the king rose to meet her, and bowed down to her; then he sat on his throne, and had a seat brought for the king's mother; and she sat on his right" (I Kgs 2:19)....First, his power and authority are in no way threatened by her. He bows to her, but he remains the monarch. She sits at his right hand, no vice versa....Mary approaches her son to intercede for the people--just as Bathsheba spoke to Solomon on behalf of Adonijah. Mary counsels her son about the matter at hand; yet she counsels others to obey Him and not her. Jesus, then, speaks to His mother as her superior; yet He defers to her suggestion." (Pages 80-83)

I truly believe Scott Hahn does an amazing job as far I have read of giving cause of the Church Teachings on Mary to be valid and honored by the faithful. I thought I should write briefly of what I was reading at the time and thought it would be nice to write something on my blog.

Until next time, God Bless,
Nikita

Holy Thursday

I have decided that when writing about the three most important days in Catholicism, I would write individual entries for each of them. So I hope everyone will understand.

Holy Thursday is the start of the Sacred Paschal Triduum, the three most important days of the year. Thanks to my supervisor I got to have the three days off (thanking her often when I see her next), so after I got out of work at 6am I went on a bus to downtown to meet up with my fiancé, JR to have breakfast. It has become our routine that every Thursday to meet up and have breakfast together.

After our breakfast together I went and found a spot to just sit and surf the internet a bit, especially since now I have gotten into reading blogs more now than ever, especially Catholic blogs. It keeps me up-to-date with what is going on in a Catholic perspective. So, thank you Catholic bloggers who write and promote the faith.

Around 1030am I was back on the bus going towards Saint Patrick’s, my home parish, because I was thinking in my head, “I have not gone to Daily Mass at all this week, I could go today”.  Nope I totally forgot that there is only an evening Mass. Thank you to the Dominican Friar whom was kind enough to remind me, and no look at me like an idiot.

So, Fr. Gregory, OP said to me after telling me the bad news that I could if I would like pray in the chapel or because for once it was a good day that I could just sit outside, all I had to do was let him know and he would unlock the parish doors for me. I was most gracious and looked at him and said, “Father, I believe I will stay outside and mediate here, but thank you.” He smiled and went on his way because the Friars have so much to do in so little time.

I sat there in front of the door, near where Jesus was located and began to mediate and I began to also write down some of my thoughts, which though it is somewhat unedited I am going to copy down for readers to read, I forewarn that this part of the entry might be grammatical incorrect, so please forgive me.

Dear Lord,

I sit outside the doors of the Church, writing to You. Not of shame, never, just taking in a kind day. I should kneel down on the entrance way and pray, but then my knees would be shot. How then would I be able to kneel and show the love and glory that is Yours?

It is Holy Thursday as You know and it reminds me of the suffering You went through the next day. I could never fully know the pain You endured. I am sicken by how much pain You endured and so many disregard what You have done for us all, not just me.

Suffering is a word I am most familiar with. Most recently I have been dealing with a type of suffering that I would like to take on so to take away the suffering of someone dear to me. Lord if You will it let me take upon the cross that is Darrell’s. I have done it before let me do it again. I know many will tell me the risks, but is it not true that Mary said “fiat” even though she knew of what would happen to her beloved Son? Could I not in turn say “yes” to the risks?

Lord I know I am rambling a bit, but comes with me one who is constantly thinking more than one thing at a time. But, today there is very little action in my head, because I can only thing of Your suffering and the suffering of my great-uncle. You know what I want to say, even if I never write them down.

Lord, You do use me as Your instrument, I am ever happy to comply. Thank you for Your infinite wisdom to allow me to keep talking to the gentlemen, for now his confession will be heard. (A/N: When I was writing there was a man trying to get in the parish thinking that his confession could be heard, as I told him about it just being an evening Mass and confession would be heard that evening Fr. Gregory was coming out of the parish doors and in turn said, “I could hear your confession”. It was a moment that I smiled and said a few thanks.)

I wonder what my true vocation is in life, I am exited when You just reveal peeks from what my vocation is to be. But only when I see You face to face will I know my vocation in whole.

That is all I wrote, it was more like ramblings, but then again, most of my letters to the Trinity have been ramblings. Still I ended it there because I was unable to write down more. I decided then it might be time to go to the Red Roof Inn, for my godmother, Camille and I were to stay the night there for JR would not be able to take us home for we (Camille and I) were doing something until midnight and he needed to go home to sleep for he had an early class.

I checked into the Red Roof and yeah wow, I love the Red Roof I had reservation at, it was nice and yet silent really, in a busy downtown area and it was walking distance from Saint Patrick’s (number one plus). I just pretty much put my stuff I had packed away and then I got myself ready for next part of the day.

Later on JR came to the Red Roof to get ready and we then picked up Camille at her job. When we all came back to the Red Roof Camille got ready and then she and I went to eat our dinner (for JR already ate and was tired and so I told him to take a nap while we went to eat, he complied, but I know he would of rather went with us). Camille and I went to Max and Erma’s and we did a great job how fast we ate because we were out of there by 6.18pm I believe. We got JR up and then we went to Saint Patrick’s.

It was packed at Saint Patrick’s and I must say I have never seen it packed that much in the now three years coming to Saint Patrick’s. The Lord’s Supper has always been amazing to me, it was the first Mass, Jesus knew He would not be with us for He was to die and be raised, in the Eucharist He is always with us.  “For as often as you eat this bread and drink the cup, you proclaim the death of the Lord until He comes.” (1 Corinthians 11:26) The washing of feet was always amazing to me as well, for He was God and He washed the feet of His disciples as a slave would have washed the feet of their master. He is as I remembered reading from one of my friend’s blogs “the servant of all”.

Once the Mass was “concluded” the Holy Eucharist is transferred out of the chapel and into Patrick’s Hall where the parishioners and Friars sing the Pange, Lingua until He is placed in tabernacle of reposition. After some quiet prayers and walking JR to his car and saying goodnight to him, I went back into the parish to meet up with a small group from 20s Group who were going to do something new that even Camille has never done, go on a seven church tour.

 What is that you ask, well it is where you go to seven parishes before midnight and pray in front of the Eucharist. James, our secretary called the seven parishes in the downtown area and asked the times they would be locking their doors. Here are the parishes we went to: Holy Cross, Scared Heart, Holy Name, Saint Francis of Assisi, and Holy Family (there was one more, but they were closed by the time we got there).

My favorite parishes we went that I highly liked that I would love to go again were: Holy Cross and Sacred Heart. Holy Cross is the oldest parish in Columbus, but the oldest Christian Church in all of Columbus as well. When you walk in you are blown away by the interior, I would love sometime to get a full on tour there and understand what everything is, the walls are painted with scenes from the New Testament. Oh I wish I had pictures to show you the beauty of this parish, maybe someday I will.

Sacred Heart I loved for two reasons. One, is the Eucharist was transferred to a small little chapel that entrance was located at the left side of the altar. It was a tiny chapel with a confessional and maybe eight pews on either side that could fit maybe twenty people in the room at a time. Second thing was when praying in front of the Eucharist at Sacred Heart, Jesus presented himself to me in a way He has been for the past few weeks, I saw through the white cloth the face of Jesus that is has been beaten and tortured.

I know many and even myself have said that it is just my eyes playing with me and yet, I cannot truly say it was my eyes because I mean I did not always see it at every parish, just at a few and even then it was when the Eucharist was right there in front of me. Jesus tends to show himself to me during Adoration too, but always of the Sacred Heart of Jesus or Divine Mercy Jesus, never the tortured face that has blood running down His face, the thorns piercing His skin, the bruising of His face, O Lord how You suffered for us!

After going all through downtown we all came back to Saint Patrick’s and was there for a Dominican tradition that I have not witnessed until this year, where they read if I am correct the Gospel of John Chapter 17. We came during the reading of the Gospel, I sat there and looked at where Jesus was and I again saw something, but not the face, not Divine Mercy, nor the Sacred Heart, but the Crucifix and I know it is not engraved on the surface of where Jesus was. It was amazing and yet, made me wonder what He is trying to tell me. He will tell me in time, for I trust in the Lord.

About four minutes before midnight Fr. Michael OP came up towards tabernacle wearing the piece of clothing that he would wear during Benediction and he took out the Eucharist and covered the Eucharist with the cloth and took Him away. At that moment I felt as if Jesus was being taken away from the Garden and lead to the Chief Priests. The tabernacle was empty; a profound moment was that I acknowledge He was not there and felt my heart ache for Him. That moment has stuck with me since.

Two Days Within

As I sit here, doing laundry I thought it would be a great time to write another entry. I want to say I wish internet at my home and not have to go places to get internet. It becomes a hassle because when I want to write an entry, I cannot post it and then it is a few days old. So, hopefully many of you can understand my little problem.


Alright, it is time to go through what has been transpiring for the past two days. Thursday was 20s Group Meeting. 20s Group is a group created to form a fellowship of young adults to not only meet new people to form friendships, but to deepen their understanding of their Catholic faith. I was most excited with this because I had experienced St. Paul’s Outreach, and though the people were kind and charitable, they were more charismatic, and as I was told by my Spiritual, “sometimes cannot be your cup of tea”.

There are many of those in the 20s Group who wish to balance charismatic and traditional within, but I am hoping we stick to the traditional way, and that is just because it is hard to find a group of young adults who are in joy with being Catholic that are not more into the charismatic movement. I am hoping through the meeting we have today (Saturday) we can discuss how many of us would like a balance between the two and not have this group going only charismatic, but that is my opinion.

The 20s Group meet every Thursday and the evening consists of Holy Hour of Adoration (which I love silence, just saying that out loud now) and then after that we have a special guest speaker, a member talk, catechist, Bible study, or something randomly fun. After that we either stay at the parish are we are going out to a local watering hole, or with the weather getting warmer going somewhere with a volleyball court or something.

Anyways, this 20s Group meeting was a lecture done by Fr. Michael, who is the pastor of the parish I attend and the group is associated with. His lecture was on “The Lord of the Rings”. I have never read the books because I never had them in my possession to read. The lecture focused on how J.R.R. Tolkien, the “father” of modern fantasy literature was able to bring Catholic imagination to the books. I loved how he was able to underline everything in the book as Catholic, but without making a new religion within the book, which would in turn create a cult. (Sounds familiar with some of the books/movies made)

One of the cool things I learned from this lecture was how J.R.R. Tolkien able to show Jesus Christ throughout the story and yet as even Fr. Michael, no one would notice. He uses three characters to be Priest, Prophet, and King. When I post this I want to see if anyone can guess which characters are Priest, Prophet, and King.

Lastly, the one thing that is interesting through out this lecture was Fr. Michael stated that in “Lord of the Rings” the day of victories was March 25th, which is for Catholics is the Annunciation. This is the day celebrate when Mary said “fiat” to God to be the Mother of Jesus. Her “yes” brought about the beginning of the Salvation, as the writer for the Magnificat says, “The Annunciation heralds the beginning of the our salvation.”

So, yesterday was the great day of Victory! It was to be the third Friday of Lent, but because it is such a special day, the Lenten practices were lifted for this one Friday. That meant St. Patrick’s Knights of Columbus served not only Fish, but Chicken. It was so interesting to have that happen, especially when I am allergic to seafood to say on Friday to the Knights, “I would like Chicken please”. They did something on the Chicken, which was have Italian dressing or seasoning on it, which literally make me wish I could have a second round.

JR, my fiancé and I sat at a table with our friend, Emily and my “adoptive” grandparents, Bee and Dave. It was wonderful to be able to spend time with them all, because though I am a parishioner at the parish, there are not many who like to sit with us because they promised to sit with their families or with families that they always sit with. Either way, I am happy that it was not just JR and I at a table.

To add to the joy, I was told that JR will be joining the Knights of Columbus. I was kind of sitting going, “why I was not told?” But, am I pleased that he is doing something that he wants to do. I am going to have a Knight as my fiancé.

Emily was at the Fish Fry because we had our Dominican Third Order make-up Novice class before the Fish Fry. I truly think it is Jesus doing something because when Emily has missed a class, I somehow miss a class and we take the make-ups together. It is nice to do that because I feel that Emily and I are like Sisters, not just in the Dominican Order, but spiritually.

The lesson was about the Government of the Order, how Saint Dominic was beyond his time for he had the Order set up in a Democratic way. And it still works! Think about this, the Dominican Order is the only order that has not broken apart; there is no break though out the eight hundred plus years of the Order.

At Saint Patrick’s Parish a normal Friday during Lent goes as follow, Fish Fry from 5pm-7pm and then from 7pm-8pm is the Stations of the Cross and then depending the night, there is an all night Adoration. This Friday due to the special occasion instead the Stations of the Cross it was Adoration. This year I have been unable to attend the Stations of the Cross with the parish because of work schedule and then last week my great-uncle went back into the hospital. So I was all for Stations, but I do not mind having Adoration either because it is a chance to quietly speak to Jesus and thank him over and over again of the graces received.

Yesterday I was also glad for Adoration for I quietly made my petitions for the soul of a high school classmate who committed suicide this past week. I prayed for his soul, but also for his family who lost the person they loved so dear to them.

As I looked upon the Body of Christ I constantly asked the Lord for the strength of not blaming myself for his death, for I knew I felt that for awhile because I was never truly there for him and I never was the ear to listen to him as he needed his heart poured out, I was not the shoulder to carry the weight of his suffering.

In the end I was kind of in a sad way glad I never went to the funeral. I wanted to, but how could you go to a funeral when you have that much regret, you know you cannot lift that regret. I did not want to look upon the faces of his family and say, “I am sorry for your lost, I am sorry I was not there for someone who seems to needed someone to listen to him”.

I would not be able to control the emotions and regret and in turn I would blame myself more and more and I know that would never be good for me, Jesus would never want me to have that regret, when I had no control over the events. I know that there will be a few people who were friends with him and read this and will come after me for not coming, I hope that when they read this they will understand why I could not come, not just because of the time, but for the reason I stated above.

I like to go on a lighter note, which is I blame my godmother for getting me so addictive to the game Sequence. Last night when JR brought me back home, we played for about I think an hour or two of the game Sequence and we could not believe that it was close to midnight by the time he left the house. All just playing that game and talking, something we liked a lot. And the game got intense a few rounds, literally. (He had to use three green chips that is how intense).

Well, I guess I should end this entry because with Microsoft Word I wrote three pages for this entry. And I do not want to bore people who actually read this blog/journal. God bless and have a blessed Sunday.