"Death is the end of earthly life. Our lives are measured by time, in the course of which we changed, grow old and, as with all living beings on earth, death seems like the normal end of life. The aspect of death lends urgency to our lives: remembering our mortality helps us realize that we have only a limited time in which to bring our lives to fulfillment: 'remember also your Creator in the days of your youth,...before the dust returns to the earth as it was and the spirit returns to God who gave it'" (CCC 1007)
Last night was a memorable talk by one of the members of the Saint Patrick's 20s Group. Dave (that is the member who gave the talk, just so you all know) gave a talk about dealing with death as a cancer doctor, but dealing with death as a Catholic. It hit home for me, with Darrell, my great-uncle who has been dealing with cancer(s) since 2007.
One of the many things I liked about the talk was Dave had handouts with quotes from the Catechism dealing with certain aspects of his talk. There were a few that stood out from the rest because they stood testament for how I observed my great-uncle's sufferings:
"Illness and suffering have always been among the gravest problems confronted in human life. In illness, man experiences his powerlessness, his limitations, and his finitude. Every illness can make us glimpse death. Illness can lead to anguish, self-absorption, sometimes even despair and revolt against God. It can also make a person more mature, helping him discern his life what is not essential so that he can turn toward that which is. Very often illness provokes a search for God and a return to him." (CCC 1500-1501)
I have watched a larger-than-life man in my family turn into a man who will look at his great-niece and say, "I don't want to go to hell". In turn you ask, 'what can I do to help this man?' and the answer for me does not only come from this talk, but from how I know the Holy Spirit has worked in me. It is through prayer and listening (as Dave reminded us through the whole talk). For me it is not praying for them to live, it is prayer to help them with their sufferings, to offer it up to God (as I have always been told by my godmother). I have become the example of helping my great-uncle I do not allow him to sit there and wallow in his sorrows because he has hope, whether it is hope in living longer and cancer-free or hope in having a "beautiful death".
What is a beautiful death, this is more of after the talk with Dave, when he explained what he considers a "beautiful death". If you notice the picture above, which is after I looked and looked is titled, "Death of St. Joseph" Dave considered this a beautiful death, he was surrounded by Jesus, Mary, and the angels, for those who are dying it is their family surrounding them as they pass on, knowing that they are praying for them and loving them, holding their hands. That is a beautiful death, and I only pray that my great-uncle whether dying in an hospital bed before the age of 60 or dying in his own bed at the age 99 he will have this moment. I pray for everyone to have that, I pray I will have that.
I only left once during the whole talk to rush into the bathroom and cry for I knew I could not keep that straight face any longer. I should of ran to the chapel, which I wanted to, but I did not want to worry JR or anyone else. I think Dave and others who know me well in the 20s Group knew this talk hit home.
One of the final things that I took home from this talk and my personal talk with Dave was this, "To pray, to love, and to listen", but we should not only do that for someone who is dying or ill we should do this for every human person from their natural conception to natural death. It is the true call to being pro-life, in my opinion.
Nikita
1 comment:
Hearing people discuss cancer and death is difficult for me too. My grandmother just died, but I didn't find that very hard to deal with because she had lived a full life and she was suffering in her old age. What is most difficult to comprehend is the death of my little sister, who had a type of cancer called leukemia and died right before she was to turn 5 years old. Unfortunately, that death ripped open huge wounds in my family and turned my mom away from God. Our family still hasn't recovered from it. But, I know that my sister has been in Heaven for all of these years praying for all of us, and I named her as my Confirmation Saint when I came into the Church. Everything happens for a reason, even the most heartbreaking things.
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