Friday, January 13, 2012

How Can I Object?

I was given the good news that my great-uncle breathing was taken out and now he can talk. It such a great bit of news and thank the Lord for that. I will be unable to visit him today because of work, but I am glad Granny will be going to see him. She has worried over him so much and rightly so, it is her son.

So, what is with the title of this entry? This whole week I have been given the gift of having my best friend, sister, and godmother with me at the house. I knew it would end where she would not be here anymore. I was reminded of what it was like to have support at home and now it is time to let go again.

Most would consider that selfish, I regret to say, I know that. So, that means tomorrow she is leaving or even tonight, I have no clue. I know I have no right to object; she needs to go back to her family, to her own bed, to her own life before this whole week began. And I need to go back to mine.

She texted me earlier before I wrote this entry and asked what was wrong, she said in one of her texts that she thinks I am getting upset about her going home tomorrow. I responded the way I need to respond, that how could I object, if I did I would think I was nothing but selfish. How truthful I was because I would love to object, wishing to keep my friend and sister with me longer, have a companion at home to talk about things, to feel that comfort when I need it.

I know that others would say that I have a future HUSBAND who can do that, but remember until we are married he cannot live with me; he cannot stay the nights and hold me and talk to me or let me cry myself to sleep. I have two dear friends and those two have lives, one will merge with mine as soon as a date is provided, but the other, well has their own life to live.

I know I have been writing very depressing posts, hopefully after this week that will change. But, suffering is ever part of my journey to the Lord. I only hope that joy will join that journey too.

God Bless,
Ms. Nikita, OP

1 comment:

J.R. said...

Dear, that is a very natural reaction to be upset that Camille is leaving. Actually given that fact, I might come to get you tomorrow! I would be just as upset in your place. You are learning something important and you are growing into a strong, confident and beautiful young woman as a result. What you are learning is that sometimes you MUST let go! Remember father's homily about the ascention of the risen Christ. Even He had to leave His apostles behind. Now Camille is not leaving permanently, but she cannot live at Granny's forever.

Bear in mind that your friendship with her grew exponentially over the last week! It will remain strong as long as you too stay in contact and work at it! Remember the words of "Friends" by Michael W Smith "Friends are friends forever!' So in short yes your initial reaction may seem selfish, but you are accepting it and you are not hiding from it. You are reacting in a very healthy way and in my opinion you are and will be better for it!